As we grow in experience and wisdom it will become increasingly clear that in order to acquire real, inner tranquillity we shall have to try to train ourselves to let go, to cease clinging with exaggerated intensity to anyone or anything, even to any specific conditions. We always risk losing them by death or a change in their nature, possibly even by a change in ourselves, for the simple reason that in this world of matter everything, we experience is ephemeral. But the emphasis here must be upon "matter".
True love, the affinities between minds and hearts, and indeed all relationships
which depend upon factors at more profound levels, endure beyond death.
It is only because the ultimate goal of every being is the attainment of perfection, that we have to learn so many of our lessons the hard way. But if we can train ourselves to accept death as part of life, we shall not dread it as intensely as most of us do and suffer so much, for our general orientation both to life and to death will change.
Above all, we shall not take the very common attitude when some such disaster
strikes of reacting to it as if it were an unjust blow by an external agency
be it "fate" or the dictate of a stern, tyrannical god.
One so often hears the cry: "Why does God permit ....?"When we have gained greater understanding we know that it is not "God" who allows or disallows. Karma it may be, but what is that but the effects of infinity deeper causes originally initiated by ourselves, energised or brought into activity by love itself (our own soul) when we are ready to experience them.
For the soul is always drawing its little child-self into new opportunities to learn more about life and love, which often means being, at least for a time, deprived of someone dear to us. Such bitter experiences are all part of the process of hewing away the rough stone so that the diamond shall one day shine forth in all its glory.
Once we can glimpse the reasons - or some of them - behind all that befalls us we shall cease our complaints and resentments and get on with life with as much wisdom and efficiency as we can, preparing ourselves, in the case of the death of a loved one, for a future reunion.